There was a very mysterious floorboard in my library.

So I decided to pry it up.

The hardest part was where the board was nailed to a big beam.

I yanked a lot of them out with a hammer.

This one had a crazy halo of ancient dust around it.

See?

The hardest nail had been in there for a million years and had gotten all squished down under the wood.

I tried to trim away the wood with an exacto blade, but it didn’t work.

My boyfriend tried to pry it up, but then he got cranky so I made him go away.

Finally I managed to cram the hammer under there and crack the board into two pieces!

It was the best day ever.

Like opening up an ancient secret tomb!

Malady liked it too.

Here’s the left side …

… and here’s the right.

I also stuck the camera down there so I could see where it went.

It went straight.

Here’s what I found down there:

  • plaster from the old ceiling lathes
  • half a porcelain knob-and-tube knob
  • two dimes (2006)
  • part of a condom wrapper
  • part of that old cloth people used to wrap wires in

Then I sort of stuck the floor back together.

The end!

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